Swimming in strange waters--A note to my ex-boss
I have had two and a half years to choose these words—I pray now that they’ll be received as I intend them.
Others have spoken publicly of the leadership you have provided for the School as well as for them personally; my observations over the past 28 months bear witness to their statements. However, my experience working with you has, from the very beginning, been an intimate and profound journey into myself. A series of truly unfortunate events led me to come to the SBE, and when I did, I really thought I was coming on a mission to help *you*. I did learn early on that you were not always of a disposition to be helped, which made things difficult.
Now, the truth about me is that though many count me as very intelligent, I can sometimes be a very difficult, and sometimes, obtuse, student; many times in life I’ve had to meet up with a sturdy brick wall in order to learn my lesson. You have been my brick wall.
I thank you for accepting my early admission that for me, “life is not a linear progression”, even though I was certain that you did not agree with me, particularly when it comes to professional development and business affairs. Without that acceptance, I would not have had the opportunity to meet, head on, the challenges that life at the SBE had in store for me. And though you seemed to chuckle inwardly that this had a snowball’s chance in hell of succeeding, you took me on.
During my early days here, I had, by twelve noon of each day, resolved to quit this place! I had been shut in that airless, windowless back room and told to “play solitaire”. I wondered, “what kind of **it is this?” So many important things needed doing, projects needed planning, and I was denied the opportunity to participate or contribute any of my hard won experience. I often thought, "damn! did he *not read* my resume? Had we not *discussed* by strengths? Is this a Frelling *test*?
I called on my support system here in Winston and far away in New York to help me through what turned out to be the most painful adjustment I’ve ever experienced in a work environment. I even bought a faith-based book on how to get along with difficult people. By the end of the week, when you asked me “how’s it going?”, I was right on the verge of exploding! That was when I started to wrap my head around the concept that this was “not my house, and things may not go as I want them to…” And that was just the first week.
Working with you and Blondena (a double whammy if ever one existed!) brought countless opportunities to deal with my greatest life challenge: my ego, pride, and my deeply held belief that no matter what life throws at me, I will succeed, prosper and excel and all those around me will know that I am one of the best! God is in the details, you see. There are so many things in my life that I’ve taken for granted—that is, I’ve taken it for granted that all of my attributes were immediately recognizable by others, but I was now swimming in strange waters!
My integrity and personal honesty were brought into question more times than I’d like to recall, and outraged and offended as I was by the notion that any reasonable person could/would attack me on this level, it had become my reality.
Each week seemed to bring on another challenge to my sense of where I fit in, how I could really be helpful, and whether I'd completely misunderstood the intentions of what I believed to be the higher power that brought me into your sphere of influence. One thing was certain, however: the formerly fabulous golden girl was losing more than a little bit of her glow.
Slowly, I came to comprehend that in this environment, I wasn't all that! And, contrary to Lenny Genduso's expressed belief, I wasn't some teflon-coated superhuman skyrocketing to the top. I started to make life in the slow lane a real meditation. I learned how to serve without expecting anything in return...except maybe a thump on the head. I learned to swim in shark-infested waters and survive.
So, thanks ATK: I couldn't have done it without you!
Others have spoken publicly of the leadership you have provided for the School as well as for them personally; my observations over the past 28 months bear witness to their statements. However, my experience working with you has, from the very beginning, been an intimate and profound journey into myself. A series of truly unfortunate events led me to come to the SBE, and when I did, I really thought I was coming on a mission to help *you*. I did learn early on that you were not always of a disposition to be helped, which made things difficult.
Now, the truth about me is that though many count me as very intelligent, I can sometimes be a very difficult, and sometimes, obtuse, student; many times in life I’ve had to meet up with a sturdy brick wall in order to learn my lesson. You have been my brick wall.
I thank you for accepting my early admission that for me, “life is not a linear progression”, even though I was certain that you did not agree with me, particularly when it comes to professional development and business affairs. Without that acceptance, I would not have had the opportunity to meet, head on, the challenges that life at the SBE had in store for me. And though you seemed to chuckle inwardly that this had a snowball’s chance in hell of succeeding, you took me on.
During my early days here, I had, by twelve noon of each day, resolved to quit this place! I had been shut in that airless, windowless back room and told to “play solitaire”. I wondered, “what kind of **it is this?” So many important things needed doing, projects needed planning, and I was denied the opportunity to participate or contribute any of my hard won experience. I often thought, "damn! did he *not read* my resume? Had we not *discussed* by strengths? Is this a Frelling *test*?
I called on my support system here in Winston and far away in New York to help me through what turned out to be the most painful adjustment I’ve ever experienced in a work environment. I even bought a faith-based book on how to get along with difficult people. By the end of the week, when you asked me “how’s it going?”, I was right on the verge of exploding! That was when I started to wrap my head around the concept that this was “not my house, and things may not go as I want them to…” And that was just the first week.
Working with you and Blondena (a double whammy if ever one existed!) brought countless opportunities to deal with my greatest life challenge: my ego, pride, and my deeply held belief that no matter what life throws at me, I will succeed, prosper and excel and all those around me will know that I am one of the best! God is in the details, you see. There are so many things in my life that I’ve taken for granted—that is, I’ve taken it for granted that all of my attributes were immediately recognizable by others, but I was now swimming in strange waters!
My integrity and personal honesty were brought into question more times than I’d like to recall, and outraged and offended as I was by the notion that any reasonable person could/would attack me on this level, it had become my reality.
Each week seemed to bring on another challenge to my sense of where I fit in, how I could really be helpful, and whether I'd completely misunderstood the intentions of what I believed to be the higher power that brought me into your sphere of influence. One thing was certain, however: the formerly fabulous golden girl was losing more than a little bit of her glow.
Slowly, I came to comprehend that in this environment, I wasn't all that! And, contrary to Lenny Genduso's expressed belief, I wasn't some teflon-coated superhuman skyrocketing to the top. I started to make life in the slow lane a real meditation. I learned how to serve without expecting anything in return...except maybe a thump on the head. I learned to swim in shark-infested waters and survive.
So, thanks ATK: I couldn't have done it without you!
posted by Unknown at 12:36 PM
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